Hi kids. I guess I'll take some time to interact with my virtual friends. Here goes:
What was your favorite city that you went to?
My favorite city is probably Berlin. It has style and atmosphere, and a history of decadence and culture. We know a few people there, which makes it more enjoyable.
What was the best show?
I think as far as energy and excitement, I'd pick the first night in London. Along with Paris and Berlin, it's one of the great cities of Europe.
What was the worst show?
The first Spanish show in Lisboa was the worst. Unresponsive crowd, dull performance.
Is Gavin really that unattractive or is it that TV makes everyone look bad?
Are you kidding? Gavin is a great looking guy--the Cary Grant of rock!
How many times did David Yow get drunk and do something stupid?
Too many times. One night, when we roomed together, he was so drunk he pissed on the floor of our hotel room. I freaked, got out of bed, and threw his clothes into the pool of piss!
Did you get any chicks? If so, how young?
I wasn't really trying. I've got a girlfriend who I'm rather fond of---and she has psychic powers! I'd never get away with it! I had to blow off Kate Moss and Melissa auf der Hole!
Do you miss Mr. Kimball at all?
Yeah, sometimes. Then I get a grip on myself.
Did you _check out_ any of those world famous Euro brothels?
I walked through the red light district in Hamburg on my way to a sailor's bar.
Did you learn any new colourful/distasteful jokes/terms/words? (if so, please share)
"Warme bruder"--warm brother, in English--a german homosexual. "Haben sie ein terminplan?" Do you have an appointment, in English--what you say to fanzine writers requesting an interview.
Was the only thing that got you through the tour knowing that we awaited your triumphant return and would celebrate with a party with you as the guest of honor? (It's true, ask drgnldy)
That, and knowing Hombre still loves me.
Were the frogs assholes?
No--the French were great! I don't know where this 'frogs =assholes' thing started, but the French shows were among the best of the tour. We've played on national T.V. twice there, which is more than you can say about this or any other country.
Did you worry about losing Travis Bean?
No, I have a homing device installed which would send signals wherever it went. The neck is also custom calibrated to accept only my strong, supple hands.
Were cigarettes and alcohol overly taxed in order to pay for Europe's love affair with the welfare state?
Not at the duty-free shops, which are conveniently located at most border crossings.
What type of shows did you play? (Clubs, arenas, festivals?)
We played clubs and a couple of festivals in France. One festival featured a not-bad-looking-for-her-age-Nina Hagen!
Who opened for you? (or, ahem, vice versa)
We had an English band called Pulkas open for most all the shows. They're on Earache, which should give you an idea of what they sound like--sort of Godflesh/Killing Joke stylee. Wonderful blokes, a bit metal, but they rock hard as fuck live, which is more than you can say about most bands these days.
Well, that's enough for now. I don't want to spoil you kids. I really did miss everyone, believe it or not. Later, DPD.........................